Locktober Reflection #24
Over the past months and reflections, I’ve often written about how, as a self-locked boi, I’ve gradually built a rhythm and routine that allow me to live chastity not just as a temporary kink, but as a continuous lifestyle.
None of this would work without a certain structure – a framework, maybe even a personal philosophy – behind it. So today’s reflection looks more closely at the rules that guide me.
We all encounter rules in everyday life. They help us behave appropriately in different situations, serve as guidelines, and can even teach us new ways of engaging with ourselves and others. Chastity, in that sense, almost invites you to create your own set of principles – small rituals that give meaning and order to the practice.
One of the first things I learned was how essential daily hygiene would be. Keeping my cage – and my body – clean is a fundamental part of how I practice chastity. In the beginning, I worried that taking my cage off for cleaning might make me a “weaker” or “less disciplined” sub. But I quickly realized that, given my anatomy (uncut!), wearing it 24/7 without short cleaning breaks wasn’t realistic – or healthy.
My PA piercing actually helps here: it connects the cage to my body in a way that allows me to unlock and clean briefly in the morning without removing it completely. Two minutes, a bit of warm water, fresh air – that’s it. Once a week, there’s a full clean and shave. I don’t see this as breaking chastity, but as honoring it – taking care of myself, my body, and my health.
Over time, I began wearing my cage not just at home but everywhere: during errands, at work, even in the gym. Today, I rarely remove it – only for hygiene, as described above. I’ve stayed locked through flights, long train rides, even cruises.
That said, everyone has to decide their own level of risk. I’ve never been asked to show or explain my cage at security checks, but I know others who have. So: if you’d rather avoid that, simply unlock before security and relock after. There’s no shame in that. Many experienced, long-term lockees travel the same way.
These experiences have shown me that responsibility isn’t just about staying locked – it’s also about living this lifestyle consciously. That includes what I call my “ethic of visibility.” My rule is simple: wear your cage with pride and confidence – but not for attention.
For me, chastity is something quiet and natural, not a spectacle. The cages I wear are part of who I am, similar to a tattoo or piercing – an expression of identity, not a sex toy on display. So I handle it as normally as possible, without making it anyone else’s business. That approach has always worked well for me.
Of course, rules also apply when it comes to arousal and release. In my case, orgasms currently are only allowed when another – a Sir, Dom, or Master – explicitly grants or causes them. This isn’t about restriction for its own sake, but about meaning. I find deep fulfillment in connecting release with intention, feeling, and mutual presence. Those moments – shaped by surrender and trust – are the ones that stay with me.
Beyond chastity itself, I’ve built a daily structure that supports it: morning yoga and meditation (both great for deepening hypnosis work), regular training (five workouts a week), a 10,000-step goal, and a balanced diet. This framework gives me focus, discipline, and peace. It doesn’t feel restrictive – it feels grounding. It allows me to move through the day with clarity and purpose, so that when intimacy and surrender come, I can let go completely.
Over time, I’ve come to see that my rules don’t confine me – they support me. They help me align my body, mind, and desires into something coherent. In the end, it’s exactly this balance – between structure and surrender – that carries me through everyday life. It gives me confidence, calm, and direction. And it’s what allows me, when the right moment comes, to let go fully – and experience true freedom in the very place most people would never expect to find it.